Blog of the day

Take a bow the Guardian News Blog!

Usually a tedious repository of poorly produced “up-to-the-minute” news written by the offspring of senior hacks as a stepping stone on their meritocratic rise to the top or by wealthy work experience students able to afford to live in the capital and travel to Canary Wharf every day while earning nothing, the Guardian News Blog suddenly sprang to life today.

Fragrant hackette Allegra Stratton was dispatched to central London to “live blog” the Police Federation march today.

And from 9.30am the dutiful hackette was in the thick of it delivering breathlessly reverential reports from the the march alongside various Police Fed luminaries, Lib Dem mayoral candidate and former Met top cop Brian Paddick and, er, the BNP’s Richard Barnbrook!

However the presence of one of the country’s most notorious fascists leading a march of 18,000 coppers to Parliament failed to register as unusual or newsworthy to Allegra.

Instead she gushed the prearranged line all day about our brave boys in white caps selflessly marching – not for themselves or to blackmail yet more cash out of the taxpayer you understand – but for a better deal for all public sector workers.

Indeed even the sight of these 18,000 coppers demonstrating within 1km of parliament and breaking the SOCPA law they violently enforce against the rest of the population failed to move the hackette to even the mildest criticism of this unfolding grand farce, while her editors quietly moved the blog off the Guardian’s home page.

However Allegra’s readership is not as stupid as she and her editors are. While she gushed so they commented, providing a rather nice and entertaining counterpoint throughout the day to the ridiculous “official” version of events being offered up by the Guardian.

Here’s some of what was said:

They don’t deserve a pay rise, we are more than generous enough with these racist scumbags anyway

Most of them are not very bright either. For example the exam for senior officers is 150 multiple choice questions of 4 answers needing only 75% to pass. Unfortunately the pass mark has had to be lowered (to what they won’t tell us) as they are too pig ignorant to get this.

They have had their snouts in the trough for far too long, they should be looking at a pay cut

I’m off on the rob!

Harry Roberts is our friend, he kills coppers!!!

Unbelievable, these pigs have the easiest, cushiest jobs in Britain. I wouldn’t mind getting £20k+ for drinking tea and eating cakes all day. Then they all scam their overtime so most are actually on £40k+ for an extended tea party.

I’m just gutted I only found out about this today or I’d have made the trip to the smoke with a big banner: “Get back to work you lazy pigs!”

I’ve just come form the march. Have you not yet noticed that a huge number of protesting policemen are marching past parliament despite having been banned from doing so by the Home Office?

Perhaps rather than following Paddick around you should get out and about a bit more – you might find a story if you look hard enough…

I’m far too intelligent to join the police. They wouldn’t have me. The force is made up of halfwits that are too stupid to realise they are working for only 0.001% of the population – the elite.

I suppose you were never going to expect those policing the event to do anything other than look kindly on the police protest, sorry, “individual lobbying of MPs”. But if there were any banners displaying signs of protest then that is also breaking Socpa law. I would think this was worth investigating, but I hate to be cynical, why bother? It’s not like we don’t know that the police act with impunity, assaulting members of the public and using the Socpa act to more or less do as they please. And now they’re looking for sympathy. A bit rich don’t you think.

They shouldn’t get one penny more. Investment in affordable housing, medical care for our elders and education is what we need. This is the worst publicity stunt ever by the police, which won’t give them any support in any community ever. What a pseudo march.

It seems, on face value we are talking about many police officers breaking a law which is the cornerstone of he governmet’s recent legislation and a law that has been used by individual police officers to attack and maim innocent members of the public exercising their legitimate right to protest peacefully.

Thousands of police with visible signs of protest? If this is true they have all broken the law. Now that would be, should be a story.

If, as it appears, the reports here are true then the Met have acted in accordance with an interpretation of a draconian act that they would never ever apply to anyone else. This should be headline news!

Top stuff! Best entertainment I’ve had in ages. But be warned since about 4.00pm Allegra and her editors have been engaging in some Orwellian style revisionism …

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4 Responses to Blog of the day

  1. Archie says:

    so when her house gets broken into by some low life looking for things to sell to fund a drug habit who will she call? after reading the above I don’t think it will be the police, and besides, after writing that I don’t think they will come. Which begs the question,who will she call?

  2. bristolian youff says:

    people in her street for a start

  3. Lou says:

    Came down from bristol yesterday(23rd) to london observe the weirdist demo I have ever seen. Photos and impressions on blog.
    Rather enjoyed your stuff on urban beach last year.Hope I can rase a smile with yourself.

  4. bristolian youff says:

    ah…. im to eager… and would i really want to rush out of my house to defend some guardian journalist…. i should give the crack head a hand

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