Brace yourselves. This may come as a shock… Hateworld can EXCLUSIVELY reveal that tabloid newspapers will print any old bollocks!
“Lesbian romps at cocaine bash” thundered The Sun on Friday in a story about our Emily, the Big Brother Bristolian and Downend’s biggest celebrity export since Bananarama.
“The 19-year-old — who has posted pictures of herself on a website looking “wasted” next to a toilet — left partygoers stunned as she stripped another girl,” drooled the newspaper of the privately educated, Tory voting drama student, “Emily then fondled her boobs before disappearing into a bedroom with her for the night.”
Blimey. Hot stuff eh? And there’s more… “She also performed crude acts on lads at the bash and did a raunchy lapdance for one.”
And more… “One partygoer said: ‘We were at this girl’s house outside Bristol last April and I saw Emily sniffing coke in the kitchen.'”
Sounds like our Emily’s pretty game then… Er, not exactly. Our man at the party has a slightly different tale to tell:
“I was at the party – and it was not it was not all it has been cracked up to be. She drank 2 Bacardi Breezers and some Scrumpy then went outside to eat fish and chips whilst looking at the stars. When she went back in all these spotty youth said things like “I bet you have been shagging….”
So there you have it. The base metal of normal teenagers drinking alcopops and cheap scrumpy followed by a fish and chip supper transformed by Murdoch’s finest into the tabloid gold of “Lesbian romps at cocaine bash”.
Who’d of ever thought it?