Leadership: Bristol City Council style

We’re only paying ’em £150,000 a year between them. So I suppose it’s too much to ask Labour’s Education Exec Derek Pickup or the city council’s Director of Education, Heather Tomlinson, to explain to us why the results that have just been released for primary school kids in Bristol have fallen.

It seems that way as both of them are – entirely coincidentally – “on holiday”. Presumably it never crossed either of their minds to take a holiday after the publication of these results? Or maybe co-ordinate their holidays so they’re both not away at the same time like every other fucker has to?

Never mind. They’re gonna let us know what they think when they eventually swan back in to work at the end of the month with their sun tans and duty free. You can only applaud the commitment.

Posted in Bristol, Education | | There are 2 comments

Shayler speaks!

David Shayler has denied declaring that he’s the reincarnation of Jesus Christ, King Arthur and Leonardo da Vinci in The Times. He explains:

“I’m afraid I didn’t claim to have been Jesus or to be ‘divine’, as you suggest. The Jesus of the New Testament is an archetype. His name derives from the 13th Name of God in Qabalah, which helps activate the Messiah consciousness within us. I was, though, crucified with a crown of thorns and nails when incarnated as Astronges, a Jewish revolutionary put to death by the Romans at around the end of the last century BC . . . It would therefore be good karma for you to correct the wrong impressions you have given in your article.”

Phew. Thank god there’s a sane and rational explanation.

Update: The 9/11 Cultwatch blog has a report of Shayler on More 4 News last night. And the Daily Mail runs the story.

Posted in Conspiracy theories, Loonspuddery | | There is 1 comment

BCCBeebies' Children's hour

BCCBeebies

Hello children. Where are we today?

Yes. We’re back in the LEA Garden…

Whoopsy Daisy

Oh look…

Who’s this coming?

Hooray!

It’s Heather Whoopsy-Daisy…

Hello Heather Whoopsy-Daisy…

Oh dear…. What’s wrong Whoopsy Daisy?

Have the nasty Redland Greenies squandered squillions and left you in the lurch again?

No? Then what is wrong with you today Heather Whoopsy-Daisy?

Oh no… That’s terrible…

All the little children in the LEA Garden have failed all their tests and it’s all your fault…

And you don’t know what to do…

Hmmm… Difficult… But wait a minute…

Who’s this coming?

Pakka-LiesHooray!!! It’s Simon Cappa-Pacca-Lies…

Hello Simon Cappa-Pakka-Lies.

How are you?

Can you help Heather Whoopsy-Daisy?

She’s in a lot of trouble…

All the children in the LEA Garden have failed their very important tests.

And it’s all Heather Whoopsy-Daisy’s fault.

What can she do?

What did you say Simon Cappa-Pacca-Lies?

Blame it all on the Tombli-Teachers!!!

What a good idea!

And look! Who’s this coming through the garden?

Yes. Here they are! It’s the Tombli-Teachers…

Tombliboos Quickly Heather Whoopsy-Daisy.

Call the Tombli-Teachers over here…

Hello Tombliteachers.

Heather Whoopsy-Daisy needs a word with you…

Now sit down and listen very, very carefully…

All the little children in the LEA Garden have failed their very important tests and it’s all your fault…

What have you Tombli-Teachers got say about that then?

Oh dear… What a shame…

The Tombli-Teachers can’t speak in the LEA Garden can they?

But it’s all your fault Tombli-Teachers. Do you understand?

All the little children in the LEA Garden have failed their very important tests because of you…

Tut, tut…

Sssshhh… Listen… The Tittifers are singing…

It’s time to go to bed…

Off you go now Tombli-Teachers and make sure you don’t spoil all the fun for all the children in the LEA Garden and upset poor Heather Whoopsy-Daisy ever, ever again.

Good night Tombli-Teachers…

And thank you Simon Cappa-Pacca-Lies.

It’s time for you to go to bed too.

Put your sponge and your uff-uff and your special trumpet in the Og-Pog and off you go to your office to dream up some more lies.

And you Heather Whoopsy-Daisy.

It’s time for you to go to bed too…

Off you go to your expensive boat and be sure to thank Simon Cappa-Pacca-Lies before you go

Thank you Simon.

Goodnight Heather…

Good night Tombli-Teachers…

In the night garden

Oh No! Who’s not in bed!

Igglepiggle’s not in bed!

Don’t worry Igglepiggle it’s time to go…

Pip pip, onk, onk! Good night children.

Glossary

Posted in Bristol, Education, Local government | | There are 3 comments

Is Bristol run by the cops?

The saga of the dumb-ass dispersal order for young people on College Green continues…

No skateboarding - College Green
Photo ‘No Boarding’ by Fat Mandy

14 year old Ellie Vowles wrote to The Evening Cancer over two weeks ago about the College Green dispersal order (Blogger Passim) requesting that local MPs and councillors “reply, giving your views and saying what you will do”.

And remarkably they have. First out of the blocks was Ellie’s local MP Labour’s Kerry McCarthy. She wrote to The Cancer saying:

“Young people have always tended to congregate in public places in town and city centres, which does not in itself constitute anti-social behaviour. And I would urge the police, youth services and other local agencies to work closely with the young people who use College Green as a meeting place, to address some of the causes for concern, so that a positive outcome can be reached.”

And she concluded, “In this particular case, I believe that the decision to seek a dispersal order for College Green may have been premature.”

Then Bristol West’s Lib Dem MP Stephen Williams pitched in at the end of July with a statement in parliament no less (that was badly misquoted in The Cancer). He told the Minister for Children, Young People and Families, Beverley Hughes in response to her announcement of a 10 year ‘Aim Higher’ strategy for young people:

“I hope that the statement is the welcome start of a departure from some of the language of the Tony Blair era, namely the language of marching children to cash points, the language of dealing with feral youth and the the language of imposing dispersal orders on young people, such as the fatuous dispersal order imposed on skateboarders in my constituency this week.”

Ms Hughes weakly responded: “Many young people suffer from such [anti-social] behaviour and we need to protect them and demonstrate to them that they are part of our consideration.”

Last week saw the two local Lib Dem councillors for Cabot Ward, which includes College Green, enter the fray. Alex Woodman announced on his blog he hadn’t even been told about it let alone consulted:

I’m very unhappy at not having been consulted about this – very, very unhappy. My inclination is to be opposed – there seems to be something fundamentally illiberal about dispersal orders. However, I’m still waiting for the police to get back to me with a justification for why they think it is necessary before making a final judgement. In any case, I don’t like finding out about things like this from the Evening Post…

He was followed just days later by his Cabot Ward Lib Dem colleague, Mark Wright:

I would like to point out that as the local Councillor I was not consulted about the dispersal order, and if I had been consulted I would have opposed it. It is entirely the wrong way to get youngsters to respect society and authority; it will get exactly the wrong results. The way to deal with any problems on College Green is to engage with the youngsters there and get them to understand the issues and learn to control the situation themselves.

So there you have it. A whole series of our elected representatives, directly responsible for the area in question, all against the dispersal order and what happens? The dispersal area remains in place!

And then they wonder why people don’t vote. Perhaps it’s got something to do with the fact that our politicians don’t have any power? Instead they’re given access to newspapers to issue some kind words, handed very expensive publicly funded debating chambers to hang around whinging in and then, presumably, they just hope nobody will notice they don’t actually do anything whatsoever?

Meanwhile the people making all the decisions are unelected, appointed bureaucrats, seemingly immune from even having to listen to, let alone act on, the demands of our democratically elected representatives.

In this case it seems Chief Constable, Colin Port assisted by his sidekick – some ASBO obsessed bint called Kathryn Perks – are taking the decisions. Who are they accountable to exactly? It’s certainly not us.

Posted in Bristol, Local government | | There are 17 comments

Bristol City Council: the priorities

A couple of city council jobs currently on offer to compare and contrast…

Night Care AssistantFirst up, we have a Night Care Assistant required at Concord Lodge, a residential assessment unit for adults who have learning difficulties and who may present “a challenge”. The salary for this post is just £12,372 a year or around £6.34 an hour.

For this magnificent sum, paying barely a pound an hour above the minimum wage and at least £5 an hour less than the alleged average wage, you must work nights and take on the responsibility to “consistently ensure residents health, safety, dignity, privacy and independence is promoted”.

EqualitiesPerhaps then, you might prefer to try your luck as an Equalities and Community Cohesion Officer in the Chief Executive’s Department? You can start on a cool £29,859 or £15.31 an hour – way above the alleged average wage.

And what massive responsibilities do you have to take on to earn this considerable sum? Er, just organise some work placements in the council for black and disabled people!

It’s revealing that this job ad in what the Chief Exec now instructs us to call “equalities and social cohesion” makes no mention of economic inequalities or – I better whisper it – class inequalities.

Posted in Bristol, Local government, Social Care | | There are 5 comments

David Shayler is the new Messiah!

It’s true. Former MI5 operative David Shayler announced last Sunday, 29 July 2007, at the Glastonbury Symposium – a yearly meeting of crop circle enthusiasts and 9/11 conspiracy nuts – that he was the re-incarnation of Christ and also King Arthur, Leonardo Da Vinci and a host of other historically significant figures.

Shayler’s road to Ickedom has been coming for some time now. Since leaving MI5 in 1996 and selling dubious stories about the security services to the Daily Mail he has become an increasingly marginal figure. Along with his partner Annie Machon he pitched up for a while in the anti-war movement but his erratic views and their former jobs working for MI5 assessing internal security threats such as trade unionists, communists and anarchists did not play too well.

Then Shayler and Machon hooked up with the so-called “Truth 9/11” movement. This is a loose alliance of people who believe that 9/11 was an inside job by the US security services. Shayler and Machon quickly became leading spokespeople for the movement.

Last year Shayler told Sky News he believed in the “no plane theory” that the aircraft that hit the twin towers were in fact holograms, now he’s taken that small, extra step to all out bonkers…

Not too good for the already threadbare credibility of the 9/11 “truth movement”.

Postscript: The 9/11 Cultwatch blog – the only other outlet running the story – has reproduced an old Class War article on Shayler with some interesting insights.

Posted in Conspiracy theories, Loonspuddery, West Country | | There are 2 comments

The Blogger is away…

… Until Sunday. Here’s something to ruminate on:

Vote for home care get well-paid Public Arts Officers!

I Write regarding the article on home care campaigners. Well over 150,000 additional hours of extra home care are desperately required in Bristol.

Bristol Evening Post 30 July 2007
_____________________________________________________

Public Arts Officer

Media Guardian 30 July 2007

Posted in Bristol, Bristol Evening Post, Home Care, Local elections 2007, Local government | | There are 3 comments

Top 20 political blogs

The voice of Tory Party Central Office, blogger Iain Dale, is asking people to name their top 20 political blogs to go into the 2007 Guide to Political Blogging in the UK.

The deadline for submitting your Top 20 is August 15. Email your list to iain AT iaindale DOT com and type Top 20 in the subject line. Your top blog will get 20 points and your twentieth gets 1 point. You don’t have to send 20, but try to do 10 as a minimum. Feel free to vote for The Bristol Blogger.

You can also post your list directly as a comment to Iain’s blog here.

The Blogger’s top 20 would probably look something like this (although it’s subject to regular change):

1. Harry’s Place

2. Dizzy Thinks

3. Ian Bone

4. Fat Man on a Keyboard

5. 9/11 Cultwatch

6. Recess Monkey

7. Drink-soaked Trots for war

8. I intend to escape… And come back

9. The Nation of Duncan

10. Downing Street Says

11. Benedict Brogan’s Blog

12. Iain Dale’s Diary

13. Spectator Coffee House

14. Butterflies and Wheels

15. Chicken Yoghurt

16. Guido Fawkes

17. Tom Watson

18. Oliver Kamm

19. Burning our money

20. Normblog

Any recommendations? And anyone know why right wing blogs are better than left wing blogs?

Posted in Blogging | | There are no comments yet

This is priceless

Anyone following the Nick Cohen/Johann Hari spat across the internet at present?

It started with the intensely irritating Independent columnist Hari writing an ill-judged review of Cohen’s book What’s Left? for the New York based Dissent magazine. Cohen has now responded with an excellent hissy fitty also to be published in the magazine.

Now the row is spreading across the internet. Liberal-leftie neo-con Oliver Kamm has burst a gasket (twice, er three times now). Then Harry’s Place joined in and now Hari’s threatening them with a defamation action using the Independent’s lawyers. The added frisson here is that Hari used to write for Harry’s Place!

If you want to find out more start at Drink Soaked Trots. Be quick though, posts are being pulled left, right and centre.

Posted in Blogging, Journalism, Media, The British Left | | There are no comments yet

Tory blog joy

Charlotte Leslie blog

Well rah, rah, rah, jolly hockey sticks and hurrah! hurrah! This looks like terrific fun what? Our very own genuine Tory voice of Oxbridge, private education and privilege (surely modern Conservatism? Ed) right here in Bristol.

The Blogger’s favourite Tory candidate for Bristol North West, Charlotte Leslie, has now started a blog in which the main aim appears to be to create the impression she lives in Bristol. She doesn’t of course. She lives and works – for Cameron’s Tory Party – in London, just like her Oxbridge educated New Labour barrister opponent, Sam Townend, in fact!

Her blog proves one thing at least. The best schooling money can buy, an Oxbridge education and flitting from Westminster think tank to Westminster think tank don’t mean you can write. This is gonna be fun.

Charlotte’s blog is now on The Blogger’s blogroll along with fellow South Gloucestershire Tory Nicolas Webb who covers some Bristol issues.

Posted in Blogging, Bristol, Bristol North west, Conservatives | | There are no comments yet