While our poor little diddums council officer-wofficers struggly-wuggly to get their worksy-woo done in good time to allow proper democratic oversight of their work, there’s no such problems in Derby.
Their gormless councillors agreed on Wednesday night to try and become a World Cup host city without a suspension of normal democratic procedures in sight.
But more to the point, not only are their officers faster and more efficient than our lot, they also provided vastly superior information, including a simple to understand handout (Appendix 2) on just how dodgy their city’s ‘Host City Agreement‘ with FIFA was going to be.
Here it is. It’s eye-watering in parts:
SUMMARY OF MAIN UNFAVOURABLE TERMS IN THE HOST CITY AGREEMENT
Development of Host City Obligations
1. FIFA reserves the right to unilaterally change the terms of the agreement
2. The Host Authority must comply with and bear the cost of implementing any guidelines/directions/instructions issued by FIFA at a later stage.
Absence of Compensation/Liability
3. FIFA and the LOC have the right to terminate the Host Agreement without compensation if the Stadium Agreement or Host Agreement is terminated for whatever reason.
4. In the event of a match or several matches being cancelled FIFA or the LOC will be under no obligation to compensate the Host City in any manner.
5. FIFA nor the LOC will be liable for any loss caused to the Host City even if it has been caused by the formers negligence.
Protection of Commercial Rights
6. The Host City must enact by-laws and regulations to prevent unauthorised third parties undertaking “Ambush Marketing”.
7. The Host City must appoint staff to assist FIFA in the protection and enforcement of commercial rights such as media, marketing and intellectual property rights.
8. Host Cities must warrant not to enter into any agreement that would restrict or prohibit FIFA, LOC or any of their Commercial affiliates, service providers or commercial rights holders from exercising their rights.
Host City Support
9. The Host City must provide support and assistance to FIFA in relation to the hosting and staging of the competition.
10. Within the “Controlled Area” surrounding the stadium where the matches will be played the Host City must ensure that any advertisements are removed or fully covered, no sale of food, drink or souvenirs, etc is allowed and that existing permits and concessions and licences are suspended.
Host City Dressing
11. The Host City must 2 years prior to the World Cup submit for FIFA and LOC written approval a detailed plan of how it will comply with its “Host City dressing” obligation (ie comply with FIFA official decoration programme) which the Host City must at its cost be responsible for installing, maintaining and dismantling.
12. No later that 3 years prior to the World Cup the Host City must provide the LOC with a traffic management plan which it must implement at its own cost and pass all necessary by laws to implement.
I think my favourite one is, “The Host City must appoint staff to assist FIFA in the protection and enforcement of commercial rights.”
This means they’re gonna spend my council tax employing an army of little Hitler’s to march around with clipboards protecting McDonald’s exclusive advertising rights. What a sensible use of tax payers money.
It’s almost enough to make you want them to win the bid isn’t it? A month’s entrenched warfare between the city’s subvertisers and graffiti writers and suited and booted city council/McDonald’s private pseudo-cops would be quite something.
Must remember to invite Banksy along if we get it too ..